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770 Research says people who reach their 60s without close friends aren’t lonely because nobody wanted them — they’re lonely because they became so good at not needing people that people eventually stopped trying, and both of those things happened so gradually that neither one felt like a decision at the time

Silicon Canals
Christian Kelly @ Silicon Canals · 03/19/2026 07:00 EDT

Research says people who reach their 60s without close friends aren’t lonely because nobody wanted them — they’re lonely because they became so good at not needing people that people eventually stopped trying, and both of those things happened so gradually that neither one felt like a decision at the time

There’s something I didn’t notice until my late thirties. I’d look at my phone and realise I hadn’t spoken to some of my closest mates in months. Not because anything went wrong. Not because of some falling out or dramatic betrayal. Just because life got busy, and I assumed the friendships would hold themselves together ... Read more

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