4 place 0

767 I asked eight people who stayed in unhappy marriages for decades why they didn’t leave and not one of them said the children, the money, or the fear — every single one described the same internal calculation, and it wasn’t about staying. It was about what leaving would confirm about a decision they’d already spent years defending.

Silicon Canals
Sarah Mitchell @ Silicon Canals · 03/18/2026 16:00 EDT

I asked eight people who stayed in unhappy marriages for decades why they didn’t leave and not one of them said the children, the money, or the fear — every single one described the same internal calculation, and it wasn’t about staying. It was about what leaving would confirm about a decision they’d already spent years defending.

Over the past few years, I’ve interviewed eight people who stayed in unhappy marriages for decades before finally leaving. I expected them to cite the usual reasons: the children, the financial entanglement, the fear of being alone, the complexity of disentangling a shared life. Not one person mentioned those things first. Instead, every single conversation ... Read more

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