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788 I used to think I had commitment issues and then I noticed the pattern wasn’t about commitment at all. It was about the specific moment someone started treating me like I was guaranteed, and I realized the thing I was afraid of wasn’t staying. It was being taken for granted by someone I couldn’t leave

Silicon Canals
Daniel Voss @ Silicon Canals · 04/16/2026 22:47 EDT

I used to think I had commitment issues and then I noticed the pattern wasn’t about commitment at all. It was about the specific moment someone started treating me like I was guaranteed, and I realized the thing I was afraid of wasn’t staying. It was being taken for granted by someone I couldn’t leave

For years I called it commitment-phobia. Looking honestly at the pattern, the fear was more specific: being treated as guaranteed by someone I could no longer leave. Here's what attachment research and my own mistakes taught me about the difference.

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