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40 Psychology explains people who grew up with very little affection become adults who are deeply uncomfortable being comforted — not because they don’t need it but because need, expressed openly, was never safe, and the body that learned that keeps flinching from the very thing it was always asking for

Silicon Canals
Tommy Baker @ Silicon Canals · today 15:30 EDT

Psychology explains people who grew up with very little affection become adults who are deeply uncomfortable being comforted — not because they don’t need it but because need, expressed openly, was never safe, and the body that learned that keeps flinching from the very thing it was always asking for

Forty years of working in people's homes taught me to spot the telltale signs—the shoulder that stiffens at a friendly pat, the confusion when offered help—but it took me decades to realize I was watching myself in their mirrors.

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